Breasts

I have recently begun to realise that approximately 50% of the population is obsessed with breasts. I think you know which sector of the population that is. That's right, women. I suppose we all need a part of the anatomy to hang our pride, neurosis, perhaps our very identity on, and in the absence of a certain other part, this role is filled, often amply, by the aforementioned protruberances.

Size seems to really matter to women, whereas men profess that it is quality, not quantity, that counts. You have only to examine the pages of page three to see that breasts of all sizes are displayed.

I have a theory that there is a feeding response that is triggered in people of all genders by visible breasts. Possibly large breasts make one hungrier than small ones, somehow. (Another interesting response that I have noted is that of sympathetic eating: when one is watching somebody taking a mouthful of food, one naturally and subconsciously opens ones own mouth.)

It may have been Desmond Morris that suggested the similarity between breasts and bottoms is no coincidence. Evolutionary selection is responsible for shaping breasts into similar 'humps' to those on the posterior, the reason being that bottoms are primary sexual characteristics, triggering a sexual response in males. In our close cousins, the baboons, one can see how this can be taken a little far.

Since humans have walked upright, our posteriors and faces are not generally aligned in a way that presents the posterior directly to the eyes. Therefore, breasts have taken on that role, by imitating the shape and therefore stimulating the same response as the backside. It's a wonderful hypothesis, and I have given it a little thought, although I find it rather easy to get distracted in my research.